Monday, 14 May 2012
Child care workers said this... thoughts for talk 5
1. " You cant change them.... a leopard can't change its' spots "
2. "He shouts and screams, gets aggressive and then sometimes breaks windows"
ME " what do you do then?"
"Oh, we've learnt to live with it. We've got used to it"
3. A general gathering of all staff and children were held to discuss children's rights.
CHILD " Can a child care worker stop you from eating breakfast just because you come late to the table?"
ME " No"
CHILD CARE WORKER TO ME LATER "Don't ever do that again! Don't ever say to a child that what I
do is wrong!".
4. KITCHEN SUPERVISOR with no rights to hire or fire dismisses a kitchen worker without using proper procedure in terms of labour practice. The grievance is made and the kitchen worker is re-instated. The Kitchen Supervisor goes off sick.
CHILD CARE WORKER " If she dies it will be on your head !!"
5. " You pay me to be like a fireman. I do my own thing until there is a problem - THEN... I come out and deal with it.... THAT'S IT!! "
6. ME at a staff meeting with the new regulations attached to the Act." You may no longer hit the boys"
THREE CHILD CARE WORKERS throwing the new regulations into the middle of the room, " We might as well resign now !!"
Friday, 11 May 2012
South African Child and Youth Care locked up? Pity!
A thought for talk in this blog-site raised a response on Face Book. It had to do with where child and youth care belongs - in Social Work or in Psychology. She made it clear she believed it is a field of study, a discipline in its own right and should be in a Department of Child and Youth Care. When a School of Child and Youth Care was suggested, she liked the idea, saying "then we would be educated in our own vocabulary. We would be able to tell of the things we hear said to us every day".
"What we hear said to us every day" in South Africa and what we say and do when we hear it, suggests that there may well be a distinctly South African set of situations and a South African child care language, a South African vocabulary of experience and practice out there... in both our residential facilities and our community based settings
The Isibindi model is a prime example of a unique South African approach to community based child and youth care work. But there is equally something unique about our Youth Centres and Treatment Centres . Unique models must surely be developing a richness of their own concepts, language and practice which can meld or should be melded into what we can call distinctly "South African Child and Youth Care worthy of recording and study.... a contribution to the rest of the child care world.
We use African languages in our every day practice and that in itself must mean that there are concepts, nuances of meaning an focuses different from Europe and America.
One of the characteristics of a profession is that it has its own body of knowledge. It cannot be that our knowledge base, here in Africa, is limited by what we learn or get from Europe and North America. We do have a wealth of knowledge here.
Good practice implies sound theory ( and visa versa ) Seems that we must even have unarticulated South African theories of child development and intervention underpinning our practice.
But where is this body of South African Child and Youth Care knowledge? Where are these theories?
Hidden in our practice? Locked away in what we hear, say and do every day?
Another characteristic of a profession is that it has its own body of literature. It means that if we are responding to to the African world view of the children in our care. If our children's inner and outer African experiences shape our individualised interventions in what can then only be a distinctly African way - then we have to hear about it.... the world has to hear about it.
Our South African stories, our South African knowledge has to be shared, researched, published.
"What we hear said to us every day" in South Africa and what we say and do when we hear it, suggests that there may well be a distinctly South African set of situations and a South African child care language, a South African vocabulary of experience and practice out there... in both our residential facilities and our community based settings
The Isibindi model is a prime example of a unique South African approach to community based child and youth care work. But there is equally something unique about our Youth Centres and Treatment Centres . Unique models must surely be developing a richness of their own concepts, language and practice which can meld or should be melded into what we can call distinctly "South African Child and Youth Care worthy of recording and study.... a contribution to the rest of the child care world.
We use African languages in our every day practice and that in itself must mean that there are concepts, nuances of meaning an focuses different from Europe and America.
One of the characteristics of a profession is that it has its own body of knowledge. It cannot be that our knowledge base, here in Africa, is limited by what we learn or get from Europe and North America. We do have a wealth of knowledge here.
Good practice implies sound theory ( and visa versa ) Seems that we must even have unarticulated South African theories of child development and intervention underpinning our practice.
But where is this body of South African Child and Youth Care knowledge? Where are these theories?
Hidden in our practice? Locked away in what we hear, say and do every day?
Another characteristic of a profession is that it has its own body of literature. It means that if we are responding to to the African world view of the children in our care. If our children's inner and outer African experiences shape our individualised interventions in what can then only be a distinctly African way - then we have to hear about it.... the world has to hear about it.
Our South African stories, our South African knowledge has to be shared, researched, published.
Wednesday, 9 May 2012
Phobiaphobia......the fear of fear
There's a fascinating little book called "The Paranoids Pocket Guide - hundreds of things you never knew you had to WORRY about. "Cameron Tuttle ( C.T.) 1997.
It's is one of those fun little books that sits on a coffee table and you dip in and out. It literally, in a fun lay-out, gives you hundreds of weird facts that get you thinking about what you could worry about if you wanted to:
" A hot steamy shower can be relaxing - unless the organism that causes Legionnaires Disease is growing inside the shower-head........all you have to do is to inhale the steam containing.. the bacteria" ( C.T. )
" You are four times more likely to get food poisoning from eating at a restuarant than eating at home" ( C.T.)
..... and then all those phobias !
scopophobia - fear of being naked
parathenophobia - fear of young girls
heortophobia - fear of holidays
Hmmmmmmm ... no wonder C.T. is a nervous wreck !!
One wonders what fears the children in our programs may live with.... fear of the dark, fear of spiders... of course!.... fear of dolls?.... What else?
Dikeledi had a fear that the adults in her life would suddenly disappear....go away, and not come back. She left the door open when she went to the toilet. Her thinking was that she could keep watch on the child care worker to be sure that she didn't disappear while she was going to the toilet. She was persuaded to close it for the sake of privacy, but she insisted that it be kept ajar and that the child care worker stand in front of the door. She would ask from inside "Are you there?" and waited for the reply " Yes Dikeledi".
Going to sleep was a problem. If she slept then she might wake up to find that all the adults have disappeared. She needed constant reassurance that child care workers would be there in the morning
Shift changes frightened her - a wide eyed fear when one left and another was on duty. A shift roster had to be visiably posted. Child care workers had to keep her well informed. "I'm going off now - I'll be back tomorrow at 2.00 "
Dikeledi's fear grew from the facts of her childhood pattern of experience. All the most important, significant. connected people in her life just suddenly drop out of her world and disappear. This was the pattern before she came into care and unfortunately that pattern continued.... even with child care workers in the Children's Home (Treatment Centre). It was the way her world worked for sure.
Is there a name for this?... the fear of abandonment ?` We will have to ask C.T
It is frightening to think that we may be feeding children with the things that they never knew they had to worry about... setting up fears through what we say or do, or what happens organisationally:
"If we don't get a lot of money soon we will have to close this program at the end of next month.... see it's true, it is even in the newspaper."
'If you play with your willy it will drop off"
" Girls if you drink too much Coke it's not good for you.... caffeine can reduce your ability to have children" (adapted from C.T.)
"Heading a soccer ball frequently (ten times or more per game) causes mild neuropsychological damage and lowers IQ" (C.T.)
Are you a really hot dancer? Dance floor dehydration can kill you" (C.T)
Oh Oh ..... am I a C.T. child and youth care worker?
It's is one of those fun little books that sits on a coffee table and you dip in and out. It literally, in a fun lay-out, gives you hundreds of weird facts that get you thinking about what you could worry about if you wanted to:
" A hot steamy shower can be relaxing - unless the organism that causes Legionnaires Disease is growing inside the shower-head........all you have to do is to inhale the steam containing.. the bacteria" ( C.T. )
" You are four times more likely to get food poisoning from eating at a restuarant than eating at home" ( C.T.)
..... and then all those phobias !
scopophobia - fear of being naked
parathenophobia - fear of young girls
heortophobia - fear of holidays
Hmmmmmmm ... no wonder C.T. is a nervous wreck !!
One wonders what fears the children in our programs may live with.... fear of the dark, fear of spiders... of course!.... fear of dolls?.... What else?
Dikeledi had a fear that the adults in her life would suddenly disappear....go away, and not come back. She left the door open when she went to the toilet. Her thinking was that she could keep watch on the child care worker to be sure that she didn't disappear while she was going to the toilet. She was persuaded to close it for the sake of privacy, but she insisted that it be kept ajar and that the child care worker stand in front of the door. She would ask from inside "Are you there?" and waited for the reply " Yes Dikeledi".
Going to sleep was a problem. If she slept then she might wake up to find that all the adults have disappeared. She needed constant reassurance that child care workers would be there in the morning
Shift changes frightened her - a wide eyed fear when one left and another was on duty. A shift roster had to be visiably posted. Child care workers had to keep her well informed. "I'm going off now - I'll be back tomorrow at 2.00 "
Dikeledi's fear grew from the facts of her childhood pattern of experience. All the most important, significant. connected people in her life just suddenly drop out of her world and disappear. This was the pattern before she came into care and unfortunately that pattern continued.... even with child care workers in the Children's Home (Treatment Centre). It was the way her world worked for sure.
Is there a name for this?... the fear of abandonment ?` We will have to ask C.T
It is frightening to think that we may be feeding children with the things that they never knew they had to worry about... setting up fears through what we say or do, or what happens organisationally:
"If we don't get a lot of money soon we will have to close this program at the end of next month.... see it's true, it is even in the newspaper."
'If you play with your willy it will drop off"
" Girls if you drink too much Coke it's not good for you.... caffeine can reduce your ability to have children" (adapted from C.T.)
"Heading a soccer ball frequently (ten times or more per game) causes mild neuropsychological damage and lowers IQ" (C.T.)
Are you a really hot dancer? Dance floor dehydration can kill you" (C.T)
Oh Oh ..... am I a C.T. child and youth care worker?
Tuesday, 8 May 2012
How do you know if God is calling you to CYCW?
How do you know God is calling you to child and youth care work? Is it really a divine call.? Or could it be something else in YOU ? How do you tell the difference?
" This isn't a Sunday School Picnic. Don't think that you are going to spend your time playing with children"
Ernie Nightingale was a pioneer in South African child and youth care. I went to him to tell him that I had a calling and that I needed to know what child and youth care really was all about.
" I cant tell you whats its like ," he said. "You have to experience it to know....SO you HAVE TO TEST YOUR CALLING . If you get this wrong, you will be very gravely hurt."
Ernie didn't right away employ people who came to interview with this explanation for their wanting to do this work. He sent them home with a list of things they must do to test their calling first. He gave me a copy of his especially prepared document which set out the tests.
Based on Ernie's list and my own as an employer, these are some discernment exercises that may help:
1. Pray.. You don't have to keep on asking the question (am I being called to child care?). Most important is to LISTEN. Spend half an hour a day in quiet time listening. Preferably before you go to 2..
2. Read the scriptures ... not haphazardly, follow a reading programme of some sort . Do not do this thing of opening the Bible randomly and pointing at a verse. Although it does help from time to time to allow, through prayer, that you be led to a reading. This should support what you learn of the possibility of a calling and not substitute for the reading programme. When following the programme LISTEN as you read. If you are being called, your reading will start to shape into a message that may communicate your call and the conditions it should or will fill. Sometimes the message "comes out at you" from the reading... speaks to you louder and is no longer simply embedded in the print. You will know when this happens.
3. Journal......... write down your experiences and feelings that come to you during your prayer and reading times. Record what you think is being said to you. You will go over and over this later to help get a clearer discernment.
4. Go out and get some experience.. best to volunteer in a program. It is really the only way to experience what really happens and the impact that child and youth care work has on you as a person.
5.Accept "no" as an answer. However, usually you are directed toward some other call .
6. If after a fair period of discernment you still believe that you are called.....abandon yourself to His will.
7. There is scriptural evidence to say that if it is His will, it will work for you. If it is not, it will fail... do not be afraid. But don't use that as the only measure . The hurt is too big a risk to take just to test your calling and it does harm to the organisation and the children..
" This isn't a Sunday School Picnic. Don't think that you are going to spend your time playing with children"
Ernie Nightingale was a pioneer in South African child and youth care. I went to him to tell him that I had a calling and that I needed to know what child and youth care really was all about.
" I cant tell you whats its like ," he said. "You have to experience it to know....SO you HAVE TO TEST YOUR CALLING . If you get this wrong, you will be very gravely hurt."
Ernie didn't right away employ people who came to interview with this explanation for their wanting to do this work. He sent them home with a list of things they must do to test their calling first. He gave me a copy of his especially prepared document which set out the tests.
Based on Ernie's list and my own as an employer, these are some discernment exercises that may help:
1. Pray.. You don't have to keep on asking the question (am I being called to child care?). Most important is to LISTEN. Spend half an hour a day in quiet time listening. Preferably before you go to 2..
2. Read the scriptures ... not haphazardly, follow a reading programme of some sort . Do not do this thing of opening the Bible randomly and pointing at a verse. Although it does help from time to time to allow, through prayer, that you be led to a reading. This should support what you learn of the possibility of a calling and not substitute for the reading programme. When following the programme LISTEN as you read. If you are being called, your reading will start to shape into a message that may communicate your call and the conditions it should or will fill. Sometimes the message "comes out at you" from the reading... speaks to you louder and is no longer simply embedded in the print. You will know when this happens.
3. Journal......... write down your experiences and feelings that come to you during your prayer and reading times. Record what you think is being said to you. You will go over and over this later to help get a clearer discernment.
4. Go out and get some experience.. best to volunteer in a program. It is really the only way to experience what really happens and the impact that child and youth care work has on you as a person.
5.Accept "no" as an answer. However, usually you are directed toward some other call .
6. If after a fair period of discernment you still believe that you are called.....abandon yourself to His will.
7. There is scriptural evidence to say that if it is His will, it will work for you. If it is not, it will fail... do not be afraid. But don't use that as the only measure . The hurt is too big a risk to take just to test your calling and it does harm to the organisation and the children..
Saturday, 5 May 2012
Sbongile's fortune turned.. his ancestor was pleased
Because traditional Africa trusts in the inherent good of worldly existence, destiny is linked to actions. Misfortune is not a matter of chance but associated with the ire of the ancestor spirits or the evils of witchcraft Hiedi Holland in African Magic........ Traditional ideas that heal a continent. (p 8 ) Penguin Books 2005.
Numbers of parents of young people in Youth Centres (in detention awaiting trial) say that their son's situation brings them considerable pain. The unfortunate series of events in the life of their family and especially the ill-fated events that led to their son now awaiting trial , they say, is a message for them from their ancestors. The ancestors are making that message through their child. It is possible that some ancestral rites have not been performed or were not properly performed. Something needs to be put right.
Sbongile's move to Johannesburg was calculated to change his fortune after his mother's death. He hoped to find work there. There was nothing in his village in Kwa-Zulu Natal, nor in the towns that surrounded it.
But life for Sbongile was not going at all well. In fact, since his move to Johannesburg nothing seemed to be going right.
His search for work brought nothing but frustration. The car he had brought from Kwa-Zulu Natal and used for job seeking in the city broke down. He had no resources to have it fixed. Even his accommodation started to become a burden.
And then at night he started to experience dreams... especially of his mother. All the messages seemed to say to him that his ancestral mother had a need and he had to do something to meet it.
Heidi Holland (2005) confirms that what Sbongile experienced is usual in Africa. Displeased ancestor spirits, she says, usually reveal themselves in dreams. An offending descendant then consults a traditional healer, who prescribes immediate appeasement of the ancestor(s) though ritual ceremonies featuring heirlooms and sacrificial feasts. ( p9)
Sbongilie didn't have to go to a traditional healer, he was sufficiently gifted with spiritual insight to know what was being asked of him. His mother wanted to be housed with him in Johannesburg. So, Sbongile made the arrangements to bring her from the village where she was buried and housed and to settle her in Johannesburg with him .
Everything had to be properly done. No detail could be overlooked. He prepared a place for her at his Johannesburg accommodation
Then he travelled to gather her and bring her to Johannesburg.
Sbongile tells of how he carried her in the taxi with the branch of a tree ( some speak of taking sand from the grave) and how he spoke to her all the way back to his house. "We are crossing a river" "We are at Ladysmith" "We are stopping for food". She was to be informed all the way. And he settled her in the prepared place where he was living.
Sbongiles fortune turned. He got work, he felt better in his health. The money allowed his car to be fixed His life changed and he was set on his journey to become a child and youth care worker.
Ancestor spirits who normally protect the family can withdraw this protection if displeased or upset by a living member of the clan......they must be appeased. says Heidi Holland ( p8 )
His ancestor was pleased.
There are boys in Youth Centres who know that their lives bring pain to the parent and suspect, or know they are being used by an ancestor as carrier of misfortune on the family......and something needs to be put right. Equally they know that family dissension and quarrels are a sure way to excite the displeasure of the ancestors. And again, something has to be done.
But what? And if you are in a place awaiting trial.... how?..... and when I explain my life to social workers and child care workers do I say any of this to them . Can it be written into my IDP (Individual Development Plan) or the FDP ( Family Development Plan)? Is this the kind of thing that can be written into a report or put in my file anyway?
Is there a place for this in "the system"./
Will I look 'primitive ' or foolish?
,
Numbers of parents of young people in Youth Centres (in detention awaiting trial) say that their son's situation brings them considerable pain. The unfortunate series of events in the life of their family and especially the ill-fated events that led to their son now awaiting trial , they say, is a message for them from their ancestors. The ancestors are making that message through their child. It is possible that some ancestral rites have not been performed or were not properly performed. Something needs to be put right.
Sbongile's move to Johannesburg was calculated to change his fortune after his mother's death. He hoped to find work there. There was nothing in his village in Kwa-Zulu Natal, nor in the towns that surrounded it.
But life for Sbongile was not going at all well. In fact, since his move to Johannesburg nothing seemed to be going right.
His search for work brought nothing but frustration. The car he had brought from Kwa-Zulu Natal and used for job seeking in the city broke down. He had no resources to have it fixed. Even his accommodation started to become a burden.
And then at night he started to experience dreams... especially of his mother. All the messages seemed to say to him that his ancestral mother had a need and he had to do something to meet it.
Heidi Holland (2005) confirms that what Sbongile experienced is usual in Africa. Displeased ancestor spirits, she says, usually reveal themselves in dreams. An offending descendant then consults a traditional healer, who prescribes immediate appeasement of the ancestor(s) though ritual ceremonies featuring heirlooms and sacrificial feasts. ( p9)
Sbongilie didn't have to go to a traditional healer, he was sufficiently gifted with spiritual insight to know what was being asked of him. His mother wanted to be housed with him in Johannesburg. So, Sbongile made the arrangements to bring her from the village where she was buried and housed and to settle her in Johannesburg with him .
Everything had to be properly done. No detail could be overlooked. He prepared a place for her at his Johannesburg accommodation
Then he travelled to gather her and bring her to Johannesburg.
Sbongile tells of how he carried her in the taxi with the branch of a tree ( some speak of taking sand from the grave) and how he spoke to her all the way back to his house. "We are crossing a river" "We are at Ladysmith" "We are stopping for food". She was to be informed all the way. And he settled her in the prepared place where he was living.
Sbongiles fortune turned. He got work, he felt better in his health. The money allowed his car to be fixed His life changed and he was set on his journey to become a child and youth care worker.
Ancestor spirits who normally protect the family can withdraw this protection if displeased or upset by a living member of the clan......they must be appeased. says Heidi Holland ( p8 )
His ancestor was pleased.
There are boys in Youth Centres who know that their lives bring pain to the parent and suspect, or know they are being used by an ancestor as carrier of misfortune on the family......and something needs to be put right. Equally they know that family dissension and quarrels are a sure way to excite the displeasure of the ancestors. And again, something has to be done.
But what? And if you are in a place awaiting trial.... how?..... and when I explain my life to social workers and child care workers do I say any of this to them . Can it be written into my IDP (Individual Development Plan) or the FDP ( Family Development Plan)? Is this the kind of thing that can be written into a report or put in my file anyway?
Is there a place for this in "the system"./
Will I look 'primitive ' or foolish?
,
Thursday, 3 May 2012
5 quick comments .....more thoughts for talk
1. An executive for Nandos Chicken said " I'm really not all that interested in chicken, but I love "Management" and what I do as a Manager.
SO.... is it OK for us to say, "I'm not all that interested in children, but I love child and youth care work and what I do as a professional child and youth care worker"??
2. ONCE HEARD ; " Parents who abuse the children that they have, should not be allowed to have more"
3. Child and youth care work has its origins in Social Work.... so that is where it belongs
4. Child and youth care work is really Applied Developmental Psychology, SO That is where it belongs... in Psychology
5. Child and youth care work is not respected because of our lack of qualifications
Hmmmmm.... What do you think?
Wednesday, 2 May 2012
Can children change the programme?
Dillon could not have been much more than 7years old. When he sat at the Boardroom table his head was just above table height. Why and how he was elected by the juniors to be a "junior representative" at "BRIDGE" became clear over time, but he seemed a strange choice at first. ... too young, too small!.
"BRIDGE" was the Forum for the children and young people in the program. It was the link between our clients (the children) and management,... their (almost) direct link to the Board of Management . After all, the customer must be heard!! Two child care workers were always present, as was the Director. The Chairperson ... a very specially selected member of the Board. I thought would be ideal if the children represented themselves by sitting on the Board of Management itself, but it was far too early in the minds of Board Members for that! So, the children had this Board member to speak for them.
After all the general business , the senior representatives and the junior representatives were on the agenda. They had previously held meetings among themselves and now had a chance to speak for the children in care.
It was Dillon's turn.
This little voice, just above the table said " Why can the girls bath and the boys can only shower?"
There was a noticeable stiffening in the bodies of the Chairperson Board member, the Director and the child care workers sitting at that table. It was difficult to think that in our program, boys don't ever get to bath.
I was the first to break the silence, using a typically defensive Director's tactic... " I didn't know that 'til now," and turning to the child care workers " Is it true?" "Why?"
" There is not enough hot water for the boys and the girls to bath" one said.
" But can't we work out a roster so that the boys get to have a bath?"
This was starting to become uncomfortable.
The Chairperson correctly interrupted. " If there is not enough hot water, then let's get an expert opinion on how much hot water is needed for the number of children in the houses and if we have to.. we can get quotes on what it will cost us to install more geysers."
More geysers had to be installed in every house at a cost of about ZAR 11,000 per unit. In "those days" a lot of money.
And the whole system changed.
Dillan could not have been more than seven years old. When he sat at the Boardroom table, his head was just above table height.
"BRIDGE" was the Forum for the children and young people in the program. It was the link between our clients (the children) and management,... their (almost) direct link to the Board of Management . After all, the customer must be heard!! Two child care workers were always present, as was the Director. The Chairperson ... a very specially selected member of the Board. I thought would be ideal if the children represented themselves by sitting on the Board of Management itself, but it was far too early in the minds of Board Members for that! So, the children had this Board member to speak for them.
After all the general business , the senior representatives and the junior representatives were on the agenda. They had previously held meetings among themselves and now had a chance to speak for the children in care.
It was Dillon's turn.
This little voice, just above the table said " Why can the girls bath and the boys can only shower?"
There was a noticeable stiffening in the bodies of the Chairperson Board member, the Director and the child care workers sitting at that table. It was difficult to think that in our program, boys don't ever get to bath.
I was the first to break the silence, using a typically defensive Director's tactic... " I didn't know that 'til now," and turning to the child care workers " Is it true?" "Why?"
" There is not enough hot water for the boys and the girls to bath" one said.
" But can't we work out a roster so that the boys get to have a bath?"
This was starting to become uncomfortable.
The Chairperson correctly interrupted. " If there is not enough hot water, then let's get an expert opinion on how much hot water is needed for the number of children in the houses and if we have to.. we can get quotes on what it will cost us to install more geysers."
More geysers had to be installed in every house at a cost of about ZAR 11,000 per unit. In "those days" a lot of money.
And the whole system changed.
Dillan could not have been more than seven years old. When he sat at the Boardroom table, his head was just above table height.
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